Afterburn

This is the second Harrison Book I have read.  The first was Havana Room which was an absolutely fantastic read and whilst Afterburn is an entertaining read, it doesn’t quite match that of the Havana room.

The main protagonist is Charlie Ravich. A former Vietnam vet who is now a successful and shrewd businessmen who crosses path with Christina Welles, who has recently come out of prison and there are several people who want to find her.

What Harrison does extremely well is the set-up, which is also style-wise evident in the Havana Room, which makes his books a good read. One interesting thing, was reading this after recently reading In The Lake of The Woods which also features a Vietnam Vet. Tim O’Brien the author, was writing about the Vietnam history of his character from experience, whilst Harrison is writing from well researched notes. The differences are subtle, but as a writer myself, I found it interesting to compare the two.

It’s a bit hard to write why I didn’t like Afterburn as much as the Havana Room as I would be giving away the ending. That is not to say the ending is a disappointment, just after being along for the ride in the set-up , I think the book lets you off a stop to early. I would still recomend reading it, but if you haven’t read the Havana Room, then read that one first. 

Sharpes Triumph

I grew up watching the Sharpe television series and was a huge fan of it. The glory days when ITV could actually produce good television.

I have never read any of the books before, and this is chronologically the second book in the series of 24 that Bernard Shaw wrote with the Sharpe character.

I was expecting it to be full of men who swear at each other but salute their officers. Big battles, and busty women -  whom are always addressed as me lady. A devilish plot with some twisting and turning, and everyone coming home in time for tea as heroes.

I wasn’t disappointed. The book has all those things in it.

The main battle that the story is set against is the Battle of Assaye where Wellesely defeated an army of a 100’000 of the Maratha with just under 10’000 troops. Sharpe starts of the book at the rank of Sergent and through the events becomes part of Wellesely Staff.  Due to his actions and people he meets,he is raised to the rank of Ensign by the end of the book.

The battle takes up a big chunk of the book, and I’m sure there is enough detail in the ranks, battle orders to appease the historian as well as the reader. (wargamers as well it seems)

I don’t think its fair to call it two dimensional, as its a very honest work in the sense of the characters are well defined, the action a-plentiful and those elements, of which why I liked the Sharpe series are all there. This doesn't pretend at any stage to be anything which it is not - an action book with a historical setting.

I also think Bernard Cornwell has an excellent skill of mixing in the history with the fiction. But, there is not enough depth there that wants to be to rush out and buy the rest of the books. If I saw one of the books, in the left over holiday reading pile  I would however, likely pick it up. 

In the Lake Of the Woods

This was another rescue from the last day of Borders and thankfully not another big pile of Dodo droppings like Clara Hopgood was. This book also made us do something, which I have not done in a very long time...

I had been reading this book on the bus traveling home from work ( I would read it on the way to work, but thanks to First Group habit of phantom buses, my hands are normally frozen by the time by bus comes along) and I got to the last 100 pages, and decided; Right going to clear and evening get a bottle of wine and finish this book on the comfort of the sofa. I think the last book that I did that for was Robert Graves Claudius the God - about five years ago.

In the lake of the woods, starts of with John Wade and his wife escaping to the lakes of Minnesota after John’s dismal performance in the elections for the US Senate. They take up a small cabin by the lakes, and are attempting to work out what to do with their lives next. Their relationship is pretty strained and we begin to see that there is more to John’s loss of the election than meets the eye.

John also suffers from nightmares which revolve around his father and his Vietnam past. One night, he awakes and goes into the kitchen where he has a near mental breakdown moment (oh that poor cactus). Sleeping in the next day, he awakes late in the day to find that his wife has gone.

At first thinking nothing of it, it is not till twelve hours later than he starts getting concerned and eventually the local police are involved and a search of the lakes begins.

There are two things, which make this a cracking read. The first is the character of John Wade through the use of flashbacks and his own internal monologue we get glimpses of his past and over the course of the book, a really nice 3D character is formed. The second, is the author uses a couple of really nice plot devices. The first is a mix of fictional and non-fictional sound bites - mainly to do with the Vietnam war and the investigation into his missing wife. Plus, why his campaign for senate failed. The information is dripped at a really nice pace. The second, and I can imagine fellow Leeds Savage member Maz commenting “I see what you did there” , is about every third or fourth chapter is a Hypothesis on what actually happened to his wife.

All throughout this I was wondering how the author was going to end it, and the way he does, I think is clever. I can see some people not liking the ending, especially if you like a book to wrap up on closure.

I can highly recommend this book, and looking forward to a few more people I know (including Mazzz In Leeds) to read it, so we can discuss the ending.

Tao Te Ching

Meh!  I have known a couple of people who really rave about this book, and I thought I would give it a read, but after reading it, not exactly been blown away. I also can’t help but think that it is in some ways, very pop philosophy. Next time I meet one of said people, I am going to ask them to actually explain what they think it means - in a nice way of course

So what got my back up about the book ? I think firstly, I never felt engaged by the writings. Something like Marcus Aurellius’ meditations, I can get very lost in and even though I found it confusing and annoying, the Tibetan Book of the Dead still had a great deal of engagement to be found. With the Tao Te Ching, It just seems to be a collection of some very odd sayings all thrown together - I cant think of any that I read, that made me want to stop and think.  To give you an example

“My Words are easy to understand and easier to put into practice. Yet no one in the world seems to understand them nor are they able to apply what I teach “

Can’t be very good choice of words then. I think the other thing that bugged me is the style that it is written, its all a bit flowery and a bit la-de-da, which might be the fault of the translation but I think also to do with the style of philosophy. On the note of translations, this was the by the same company that I bought the Tibetan Book of the Dead from and as before l not going to moan about a book that cost 99p nor recommend it either.

Going back to the book, another gripe is, it also seems to lack any backbone which is stressed by the opening line

“The Tao that be be described is not the eternal Tao”

So great, all I am about to read is not the real deal and then finally to add insult to injury the text then calls me foolish

“When a superior person hears of the Tao, she dilligently puts it into practice. When an average person hears of the Tao, he believes half of it, and doubts the other half. When a foolish person  hears of a the Tao, he laughs out loud at the very idea . If he didn’t laugh, it wouldn't be the Tao”

And in case you are reading this wondering what Tao is, then to slightly paraphrase chapter 4 and 5 of the Tao Te Ching

“The Tao is like an empty container
it can never be emptied and it can never be filled ….
It is hidden but always present …

… The more it produces; the more you talk of it , the less you comprehend It is better not to speak of things you do not understand “ - the missing bits in the above are about straw dogs, which I didn’t include as it might have made you laugh, and then you would have been foolish.

So to the sum up the Tao Te Ching, a book which is not meant to be understood and if you do understand it, the more you understand it, the less you understand.

Kind of makes me wonder if Yoko Ono would of been a far better artist is she had done nothing at all.

Clara Hopgood

This is one of the books I picked up at random on the very last day of Borders closure. I picked it up, because of when it was written and when it was set. Whist a bit earlier in time than what I set my adventures on the DAC, it was close enough that hopefully I would pick up some ideas and language.

Not knowing anything about the author, a quick read on wikipedia revealed the following. I was especially impressed with the quote from George Orwell. Doing a bit of googling, it turns out that other people such as DH Lawrence and Arnold Bennett had held him in some praise - all looking good.

I have the Everymen edition and it came with an introduction written by Lorraine Davis who is an English literature lecturer at Liverpool Hope University college. As Introductions go, it is one of the worst I have ever read. Dull, pompous, bloated and written by a thesaurus w’nker - which is not as bad as a grammar w’nker but still annoying. I am not one however to judge a book by its introduction. So what did I think of the story ?

Clara Hopgood is unbelievable.

Unbelievable that it ever got printed
Unbelievable that the likes of Lawrence and Orwell would praise the author (a joke from beyond the grave perhaps ? )

I will say one thing that is amazing about the book. It is the fact that the author spends an entire page describing some walking down a path, then crams in entire epic events in to the space of two pages.

She walked down the summery village road which was adorned with spring fauna and at the end was a small river with a stone bridge.  Then someone went to Germany and then so and so  died.

He manages to fill all 144 pages like this and it made following this story extremely hard. I think someone was an Atheist. Pretty sure someone was Jewish and I think there might of been a Quaker in there too. Not sure what they were doing, but it had something to do with a bookshop.

I am not even going to bother putting in an amazon link for this. In fact I will pay someone to take my copy away 


Disclaimer The photo has nothing to do with the book. As far as I 'm aware there was no point in the story where Clara was naked with a skeleton on a couch - though I could be wrong. I was asleep for most of it.

The World Crisis - Winston Churchill 1911-1918

This truly is a fantastic book. I have made several false starts in trying to review this book. First of all I thought about starting with what an excellent and entertaining read this has been. But is entertaining really the right way to describe an account for one of the bloodiest conflicts in human history ?

Ignoring the subject matter, here we have a book that has been written in such a way, that at no time did it feel like reading a book. It felt more like, sitting in a Chesterfield with  Winston Churchill opposite, re accounting his tales. There are several points throughout the text, which he addresses the reader directly. Either asking for the reader to  pay attention, asking a rhetorical question or revealing his feelings on a certain situation. I'm sure fiction writers would probably learn a lot from the style as it certainly works very well at keeping the reader engaged. My favourite such moment, was when the Russians were objecting to the potential presence of the Greeks in Constantinople and being generally a bit Nancy.

Winston Churchill says:

Feeling this situation, as I did, in every nerve of my body, I was acutely distressed. The time-honoured quotation one learnt as a schoolboy -”Quos Deus vult prius dementat *”- resounded in all its deep significance now that conditions as tragic and fate-laden as those of ancient Rome had again descended upon the world. 

 *those whom a God wishes to destroy he first drives mad

The language used is great. He is a true master of using the words hitherto and viz.  I have been trying to slip viz. as much as possible into documents I write at work since starting to read this.

The other thing about the style, especially in regards to the Dardanelles is, here is a man defending himself. If I ever had to defend myself in court, then I would re-read this book before preparing my defence...

The second way I thought of starting this review was by giving an introduction to the start of the First World War. Two problems with that. The first, is how much time have you got ? The second is, this is a book that is and isn't about the war.

It’s not in the strictness of sense a history book. Nor is it in the strictness of sense a Journal. What we have here, is someone who could write history and also a front line witness to the events they were writing about.

I would also say, that if you are unfamiliar with the events of the Great War, then this is not the book to start with (start with this one instead). Where this book excels is, some of those events of the war, such as the Siege of Antwerp which most books about the first world war give a section too; Listing of the preludes, the planning, the battle and aftermath etc. Here we get a lot more personal account. Whilst the numbers et al are still there, we get some get a good glimpse into the mind of Winston Churchill. He privies us with this thoughts into the impending disaster and we get glimpses of exchanges of telegrams between himself and Whitehall.  He is desperate to get involved in the action. Heading over there as soon as he can. He even offers his resignation from his post as First Lord of the Admiralty to take up the necessary military rank , so he could take responsibility for the British forces in Antwerp - This offer was refused. 


The other thing this book gives us a more human picture of some of the key people in the war. The descriptions of Sir Henry Wilson (Chief In General of Staff)  and his use of vocabulary are a fantastic insight.  Sir Henry would describe politicians as “frocks” and refered to Clemenceau (French prime minister) as “Tiger” - even addressing him as such. He would also often start in meetings with phrases such as “Today I am France..” or “Today I am Belgium...”  and using that to get to the to the root of his point. We also find out that Marshall Foch sometimes used to give military propositions in a pantomine nature. 


For the historian, this book is awash with letters, telegrams,  ables, charts and maps. One criticism, they are faithfully reproduced from the original book, but with the advent of printing technology, it would of been nice to get some modern updates - some of them are quite hard to read.

There is also some really good analysis in there. Especially the chapter entitled Britain Conquers the U-boats with full breakdown of figures of strength and comparisons between the two sides. This is then matched against losses and outputs of merchant shipping (on both sides) and is accompanied by, a probably more interesting than it sounds here write up.... 


    So that was how I was thought about opening up on this review, but it is post mortem where it should begin. After reading this book, one of the most harrowing things from it, is the realisation that the decision for so many, was made by so few.  In the case of the Dardanelles, we have a sombre tale of indecisiveness and hesitation which ultimately cost the lives of over half a million men.  In Robert Nivelle (French General) and his self named Nivelle Offensive , here we have a tale of a man so blinkered by his past success, that he refuses to take advice from all quarters (other French commanders, British commanders, French and English politicians) telling him to change his plan. The result is 300’000 french casualties in less than a month, with no notable territorial gains and an army onthe brink of mutiny. 


Then there are the meat-grinders that are  Passchendaele  and the Ludendorff Offensive. With around 800’000 casualties each. What makes this particularly stygian, is whilst the horrors of a war of attrition maybe noted by those in the decision making power, the men fighting them simply become statistics in tables and allied to enemy death ratio’s.  Key decisions are bickered about and halted by things such as loss of face and by others with personality traits that do not ideally belong in the guise of co-operation. 


The Romanian disaster is - well a definition of the word disaster 


The First World War, is sometimes refer ed to as the ‘boys war’, in terms of the young men who were fighting at the front. I think you could also apply that to those who were also in charge. This is where this book is unique and stands out. I think Churchill’s skills as a historian, cause him to write a more balanced and argumentative journal of his involvement in the war. He knows he can not white wash events, as he would be letting the historian in himself down. So he has painstakingly given all sides of an event, quoting from official history's from both sides and adding italics where he does not agree, or wants to labour a point. He is a blunt as I think you can reasonable expect of the criticisms he gives to other people. He is also keen to defend at great lengths, those who criticised him,making sure the argument is clear.  I very much doubt, a modern politician would be able to write something as balanced. 


It’s through this, we get a glance into the people and the minds of those who made the decisions.Sadly, I don’t think the world at the top is too different from that of 1911-1918 and those mistakes have and will continue to be repeated. 

The World Crisis, 1911-1918 (Amazon Link)

Theogony & Works and Days

Firstly I think Hesiod needs bit of an introduction as he is not as well known as Homer. Hesiod was an oral poet who it is thought, wrote in 8th century BC. He said he was given his 'gift' of poetic inspiration from the muses themselves as he tended his sheep in Boeotia.

His style is like that of Homer -dactylic hexameter. It is not as polished as Homer and he tends to go off of on one every now and then. The works that have survived which I am reviewing here, are very short, but nonetheless a very entertaining read.

The translation I have, is by M.L West, which is a fairly modern translation (1988) and I found the introduction notes most interesting. He talks about the problems of interpolation (dirty filthy hippy writers take note!) and also most interestingly, he talks about common themes between this and ancient Babylonian, Egyptian mythology, and more surprising Oriental mythology and influences.

My one criticism of the translation is, that the line numbers do not appear next to the text, but are rather summarized a the top of the page - which personally, I find annoying.

Theogony

Onto the poems themselves, Theogony has all your cool bits of mythology. Such as everything coming out of chaos, Gods being put inside other gods bellies - or swallowing each other. War between Titans, god and man, Thunder bolts and lighting and more.

Essentially its a chronicle of Zeus coming to power and defeating Kronos and the Titans and the creation of earth and man.  As mentioned, Hesiod does goes of on one every now and then and you do find yourself suddenly presented with a list of gods/goddesses/nymphs thrown in every now and then. In the one thousand and twenty two lines of the poems, he gets in no less than three hundred names of gods and their qualities.

Works and Days

Now, this is where Hesiod starts really  jumping all over the shop. Part of Works and Days is essentially a farmers almanac as we find out what months and seasons are best for doing certain agriculture tasks. We also get what days of a month are good for certain things such as the 11th and 12th are perfect for shearing sheep and gathering grain and the 4th is a good day to bring a wife into your house.

Now mixed into this, is a bit on sailing - though Hesiod admits he's not a sailor. Some astronomy, a feud with his brother who he thinks is lazy and got to much a share of his father's estate. The golden ages of man and, also of interest is the first ever reference to Pandora's box - or more correctly, Pandora's Jar.

Both works are an entertaining light read. Do not read the articles on wikipedia as they are dull stilted and make the works sounds tedious. They are far from that. 


Theogony and Works and Days (Amazon Link)
Online Versions

Iceberg

I have only read two Clive Cussler books but I do have to say I like the fellow. The first book I read was Black Wind (2004) which was about a planned biological attack on the United states and I picked up at random,  Iceberg (1975) the other week to kill sometime at the airport.

I'm not going to go too much into the plot of Iceberg, as I think that's half the fun of a Cussler novel is going through the twists and turns of the plot - which are many. I should also note that a plot in a Clive Cussler novel seems to be one in which you will have to take several large leaps into the realms of disbelief, but it is all done in a rather entertaining way.

The books main character is Dirk Pitt who has been the protagonist of twenty of Clive Cusslers book. The character is two dimensional in a very good way. There is no twisted Batman style past, no James Bond 'Missing teddy bear' psychological scars or anything else it seems for that matter. Dirk Pitt is an adventurer who likes fast cars, loose women and sharing a joke after getting nearly blown up/shot at/falling down/getting trapped/crashing/captured/escaping etc etc.

It makes a nice change having a hero like Dirk as you feel right from the start you know where you. You can simply kick back and enjoy and I certainly enjoyed reading Iceberg - especially with its dollop of good old fashioned squeezing the secretary's bottom and other seventies throwbacks.

The action in the story starts off somewhere in the Atlantic with a boat encased in a... Wait for it....Iceberg. Then fast forwards to Iceland before ending up in... Well not going to spoil that as it did make it chuckle where it ended up - as I mentioned, you are going to have to take several leaps away from reality.

To sum up, an enternaining read. No its not up their with the greats of literature and I doubt any CC book will be. If you are reading this and thinking it sounds a bit Dan Brown, then don't. They are a world apart. For a start Clive Cussler can actually write and whilst the leaps are there, they are certainly more credible than using your jacket as a parachute(Angels and Demons) and your are not going to find any of this.

I look forward to reading more CC books as they are perfect for reading at the airport and then leaving on a beach, which on that note, if anyone wants my copy of Iceberg or Black wind just shout.

Iceberg (Amazon Link)

Plato's Symposium

I debated whether to post my initial reaction to reading Plato's Symposium, indeed I thought about it long and hard. I  even consulted with friends, who I consider to be my intellectual equals and It turned out they had the exact same reaction. But could I put it down it writing ? Saying it over a pint is one thing, but out of context... Thankful my answer came courtesy of the South Park episode The F-Word.So here it is:

"Its a bit gay."

This has not been helped at all by the translation and introduction by Walter Hamilton which are from the fifties. The word Homosexual is rattled off at every opportunity in a way that reminded us of the Rowan Atkinson School Master Sketch

Onto the text itself, well to cut short the introduction, there is a celebration going on being hosted by Agathon after wining a dramatic competition.  He has invited over his male chums. They decide not to get absolutely plastered on wine, and instead talk about Love. I should point out, that the love they are talking about, is the love between men - old men and young men in particular. With young men being separated from boys by the fact they are old enough to grow beards.

Women do get a look in,but more in the sense they are in man's way and the love between men and women is more about immortality, compared to pure love which exists only between Men (Plato's words not mine)

There was one speech that I did find interesting which was Aristophanes going on about primeval man, who was round in nature forming a circle with four hands, four arms and a head with two faces. The gods were afraid of their power, so Zeus comes up with the plan to cut them in half to diminish their strength, and Apollo joining in to make the two halves - well human in form.  I  like this idea, as it then goes on to say how each half is yearning for  each other. Sadly from the translation, this speech bursts into comedy gold when we find out the original halves had their genitals on the wrong way round which Zeus has to correct. 

Near the end Aclibiades, a popular Athenian who turns up late and plastered and, well we find out his wooing with Socrates - there is some point here, but it escapes me.  I was Socrates' dialougued out at this point. 

More drunken guests then arrive and then they all go to bed. Except a handful, including Socrates who then  talk about how a good playright should be able to right comedy as well as tragedy. The killer finale is Socrates goes to the Lyceum to wash in the morning and then spends his day doing something before going to bed in the evening - Cracking stuff.

Not my favorite classic by a long shot. Not helped at all by the translation and its unintentional comedic value which detracted a lot from the philosophical side. In the distant future, I will pick it up again, with either with a pre 1900' translation or a modern translation and read it more seriously.  For now, my final thoughts are of the Medieval monks who must of had a cracking time translating this.

The Symposium - Amazon Link

Online Version

The Prophet

This is a book, I pick up every three to four years. It is a very short, but satisfying read. Before jumping to the main bulk of this review, a quick bit about the edition I was reading.

Its the Pan Macmillan edition 1991, with a green cover and some font, which looks like it should be saying Lords of the Ring. For some reason, the text inside is double lined and the illustrations are not reproduced that well. I bought it, as I fancied rereading it there and then, and the only other two versions in the shop was a Penguin Classic version at £8 and a hardback illustrated version at £20. This cost me £5, which is a bit steep for the quality - there are not even the chapter headings. 

Onto the book itself, it is one of my favorite things I have ever read.

The Prophet has lived in a city called Orphalese for twelve years, awaiting for a ship to take him back to his land of birth. He has come to love the city and is sad to be leaving. As he makes his way to the ship, the people of Orphalese come out to meet him. They love him, as much as he loves the city, and the priestess asks him to speak to them all, which he does. He answers their questions on such things as Love, Death, Good and Evil, Time and Religion.

Whilst there are many a good saying in the book, its not actually the philosophy side that is my attraction. I like my philosophy a bit more Stoic, and recently, I'm enjoying getting confused by dualism. However, what I do like, is the land that is created in The Prophet. I can visualise it very very clearly, and as The Prophet answers the questions from the people, the place of Orphalese becomes very real.

It is also, very beautifully written. Kahlil Gibran considered this to be his greatest achievement. He said: "I think I've never been without The Prophet since I first conceived the book back in Mount Lebanon. It seems to have been a part of me... I kept the manuscript four years before I delivered it over to my publisher because I wanted to be sure, I wanted to be very sure, that every word of it was the very best I had to offer."

It has an almost biblical type meter (I know there is a posh word for this, but it escapes me) but a lot more musical in its delivery, which makes reading this effortless, and a pleasure.

The hard line Dawkinist out there, might be put off from reading this, as the word God is mentioned a few times. There will also be a few who will be put off, as it sounds a bit Dirty Filthy Hippy - I was originally. I would, however highly recomend reading this, no matter what your beliefs are. It is very universal in its appeal.


The Prophet - Amazon Link
Online Version(Text only)
Online Version(With the original illustrations)

Vienna Blood (Liebermann Papers 2)

Firstly, I think I should point out, that I am probably not the best person in the world to review this book. The reason being, is I am not a fan of the detective genre - by a long shot. To be fair, I am guessing some people would love this book. It has all the elements, with the added twist of the story being set in turn of the century Vienna. It also has some early forensic science taking plance and some  criminal psychology analysis going on.

I know you should leave the summary to the end of the review, but I can sum it up as; "Not my cup of tea". I say this, as I do feel I am being a bit harsh in the below.

The book did start off well, but I was getting slightly jarred with the voices of the characters. There is Dr. Max Liebermann, a young disciple of Freud who is asked by his friend Detective Oskar Rheinhardt to investigate a string of murders. I appreciate this is the second book in the series, and as such the first might have set up the relationship more between them, but I felt their dialogue and thoughts, blurred somewhat.

I also think the book went on a bit. It could of done with chucking, say a 100 odd pages. I think the author may have gone a bit overboard in realing off what he had come across in his research of the period and secret societies etc. Just for the sake of including it. My biggest gripe is; from a small bit of dust they are able to determine a whole wealth of information. But when it comes to realising that 'lady of the night' could refer to a prostitute, they spend several pages before coming up with that realisation. Also, a couple of other reference to prostitutes in the book, reminded me of when I was eleven and a friend of mine had shown me the word in a dictionary, as if it was the biggest secret ever.

End of the day, its a detective novel and if you are a fan of this genre, then I'm sure it has lots to offer.
Is it a book that makes me want to read more detective genre books? No.
Is it a must read book regardless of genre ? No.
Is it an insult to Gutenburg and anyone who has worked in the printing industry ? No, not by a long shot, as said I am probably being unfair in the above. Its simply, not my cup of tea.

Vienna Blood: A Novel (Amazon link)

Right Ho, Jeeves

This is in fact the first P.G. Wodehouse book that I have read and I am pleased at last to be actually making a start in churning through the 90 odd books he wrote during his lifetime.

Right Ho, Jeeves is the sixth book in which Jeeves appear and I do not think I have missed anything by not starting at the beginning. Sometimes seeing a film or television version* of a story first can hinder reading the book and, I must admit I did have Hugh Laurie voice in my head whilst reading, but there are 'pleasant' differences between the two which distance them just far enough apart.


I've been thinking (and typing some false starts) how best to summarise the story whilst giving a spirit of the book and here is my effort.




The bulk of the story takes place at Brinkley Court and involves;

• A man who is too timid to ask a women to marry him because he has spent to far much time with newts.
• An urgent telegram: "Lay off the sausages, avoid the ham"
  
• An Aunt who has lost the money needed to keep her magazine afloat from spending it all in the casino's in Cannes. 
• A school prize giving.
  
• A couple who are engaged but are not speaking to each other; which is over a double chin and a shark.
  

Then there is Bertie Woosters attempt to sort all these affair out which results in;

• No one eating dinner and the french chef becoming suicidal.
• Too  much gin and whiskey for the Newt man.
• Engagements being swapped left right and centre.
  
• The Aunt calling Bertie Attilla.
• Chaffing from Bicycles.

Finally ending with Jeeves sorting it all out... Oh and there is a white mess jacket and some scarlet tights which I have missed from the above.

Most of the pleasure from reading the book has come from Bertie, who is the main MC, use of language. One of the things he does quite frequently through the book (I hope the rest of the books too)  is make these "you can have one but not the other" type statements which annoyingly, as is always the case when you are looking, I can not find an example of ( i will make sure I dog ear the page when I come across the next one")  but for your enjoyment; here are some other quotes from the book with Bertie describing some of the other characters:

• You know how it is with some girls. They seem to take the stuffing right out of you. I mean to say, there is something about their personality that paralyses the vocal cords and reduces the contents of the brain to cauliflower.
• In build and appearance, Tuppy somewhat resembles a bulldog, and his aspect now was that of one of these fine animals who has just been refused a slice of cake.
• And as for Gussie Fink-Nottle, many an experienced undertaker would have been deceived by his appearance and started embalming him on sight.
• It isn't often that Aunt Dahlia, lets her angry passions rise, but when she does, strong men climb trees and pull them up after them.

 source wikiquotes

All in all an enjoyable read and I will be working my way through the rest of Wodehouse at very slow leisurely pace.

*Elements of Right Ho, Jeeves are in the episode "The Hunger Strike"